This was remembered, written down and sent to us by James M

My parents long had a tape of the Kipper Family performing in Little Snoring village hall. I’m not sure what it was part of, but I think it ws recorded off the radio, as it had an announcer proclaiming afterwards that the Kippers had an album of Christmas songs released, called Arrest These Merry Gentlemen, so it must have been around 1989 or so.

I listened to it somewhat obsessively as a child, and several song so various elements of it are burned into my brain around 30 years after I first heard them. Please find the Terrible Tale of the Sidestrand Sailor attached, a story told by Henry Kipper and prefaced with an exchange something like:

HENRY: “I always say, Christmas is never really complete without a good ghost story”

SID: “Another incomplete Christmas coming up, then!”

I also have a memory of various songs I can’t find lyrics for online (O Little Town of Gimmingham, Ring Out Wild Jingle Bells, although the order may be somewhat jumbled, chunks of the Roots of the Blues). I think I need to work through Ring Out Wild Jingle Bells to get it straight in my head, but I’ve included O Little Town of Gimmingham as I can remember that pretty much entirely. It’s essentially a mash-up of O Little Town of Gimmingham, with elements of In the Bleak Midwinter thrown in as a bridge of sorts.

The tape also had a bunch of things about what happens in Trunch at Christmas. A few fragments:

SID: [U Be Quiet’s] Christmas single this week is Number Three in the Trunch Wireless Charts. We always have a chart for Trunch. It’s all based on what’s sold at Mrs [[sounds like “Day-sus”]]’ corner shop. Number one is… a large tin of baked beans again, isn’t it? That’s been number one for years.

—

HENRY: I’d like you to imagine that we’re standing here in the graveyard at St Just parish church

SID: Well that’s not very fair is it, really?

HENRY: I don’t know what you mean

SID: Well that’s easier for you to imagine than anyone else, isn’t it?